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Category Archives: J-Pop

Station To Station: Music Station For August 12 Featuring Red Hot Chili Peppers, LOVE PSYCHEDELICO And Kis-My-Ft2

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I’ve been in Tokyo all week, just sort of loafing about, and on one of my random walks I ended up in Harajuku. Amongst the waves of garish-pink fabric and whipped-cream-heavy crepes, I spied the official AKB48 store, Harajuku branch. I almost went in, except 1.) you had to wait in line with 2.) a bunch of high-school girls to 3.) ride an elevator up. I have just enough dignity to not do any of that, so sorry no AKB48 store trip report for ya’ll.

Related – Harajuku really really sucks but they had some good looking burger cafes so I’m afraid I’m gonna be coming back for that = (

Miliyah Kato “Aitai”

[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9wWWghmcyY”]

Considering she has a best-of album to sell, one can give Miliyah Kato a little slack for reheating this 2009 song in order to promote a retrospective record. Still, all goodwill gets tossed away once it becomes clear “Aitai” is about as generic a ballad can get. Kato’s preferred sound, a J-Pop take on American R&B, usually ends up being hit-or-miss, but even a strikeout beats the white flag that is this completely lame schlock. Yet now we come full circle and I admit Kato (or her handlers, ya know what I mean) are just doing what they know will move units, and a dumb ballad is a safe bet.

Kis-My-Ft2 “Everybody Go”

[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MDwY6cQCfg8″]

More Tokyo stories – walked by a music store in Shibuya promoting this song, with a booth set up and some lady talking about how radical these urchins sound. Had to really restrain myself from going all Secret Honor< on ’em.

Kuwata Keisuke “Let’s Try Again”

[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zFnVc_D2qeM”]

All I can find featuring Kuwata Keisuke is this 50-second clip of what appears to be a giant charity song which is really just a great way of playing “spot the J-Pop star.” I found Perfume! So yeah let’s just move on, I’m sure the version just with him is OK.

LOVE PSYCHEDELICO “It’s You”

WATCH HERE

Wikipedia tells me LOVE PSYCHEDELICO take a lot of cues from The Beatles and Led Zeppelin. I hear Avril Lavigne, and not good Avril Lavigne either.

両さん “三百六十五歩のマーチ”

[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qulSFcdQFlU”]

This makes me so confused. The video above features no singing, but has lyrics showing right next to the woman doing the interpretative dancing. Searching for “両さん” brings me to the page for this recently released Japanese movie that is about what I presume is a perverted cop (I’ve seen the cartoon a few times, dudes a skeez). So like, will someone sing this on Music Station? Will it just be goofy dancing interspliced with film footage? Is this sneaky viral marketing I’m not getting? Regardless of what the hell is going on here, props to the YouTube community for slapping this with 22 dislikes…but I think ya’ll can do better. A hundred or bust.

The Red Hot Chili Peppers “The Adventures Of Rain Dance Maggie”

[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8QoB3sifzw”]

The majority of Southern California loves The Red Hot Chili Peppers to an absurd level, and let me tell ya do I have a complicated relationship with this group coming from SoCal. I loved these guys when I was in junior high…FUCKING LOVED these dudes to the point I once wrote a list about how they were on par with The Beatles. That long-lost document (thank goodness) may have been isolated to me, but nearly everyone around me then…and today…was just as in love with these dick-sock-wearin’ dudes as me. Then I grew older and stuff got complicated. I’m not cynical enough to just call everything they did garbage…I still can get behind “Under The Bridge” and “Other Side” amongst others…but the fan-boyish part of me died off when I realized the white-boy funk could get tiring really fast and that Anthony Kiedes is one of the worst lyricists on the planet. Overall, I’m left confused.

Which is why I can’t say much about “The Adventures Of Rain Dance Maggie” deeper than “this confirms every single thing I thought.” This sounds like what RHCP have been doing for a long time now and dear Jesus those lyrics, but I also hear everything 13-year-old me loved and as such I sit wondering…can I really hate this when part of me would have once compared this too “Hey Jude?” The group is in Japan for Summer Sonic, and I’m going to see them. Which…makes part of me really unexcited, but an adolescent version of me stupid excited.

Winner Of The Week – I guess Red Hot Chili Peppers.

Station To Station: Music Station For August 5 Featuring KAT-TUN, moumoon And Kaela Kimura

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Here’s something I’ll never type again…reader, have mercy on the songs featured here this week. Due to a combination of moving woes (“what do you mean I’m out of boxes?????? WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN’T FIND MY APARTMENT??????”) and the [REDACTED] (this sounded way more melodramatic when I wrote it Wednesday, let’s just move on). I’m looking to tear into something that can’t bite back…and that’s about a perfect description of modern J-Pop! So yeah, this might get unfair for some of these acts. Just have mercy on them.

Ikimono-Gakari “NEW WORLD MUSIC”

[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B9X7P01YG5E”]

This…this reminds me of the Evangelion theme song I think? It’s not quite as punchy, and I might just be confusing similarity here with “features horns,” but this “NEW WORLD MUSIC” moves at about the same pace as that anime’s opening track, albeit with a better chorus and a completely unnecessary chorus. For Ikimono-Gakari, a band I’ve long associated with languid unfolders and junior-high-graduation ballads, this comes out of nowhere as a borderline party jam, triumphant horns mixed with a general air of revelry fit to soundtrack an honest-to-God party instead of the group’s usual preference of approximating a really sad school reunion. Like all Ikimono-Gakari songs, this burns a little too long (blame the guitar solo) but gotdamn this at least spikes the Coca-Cola Zero and breaks some pieces of IKEA furniture during its long stay. Ikimono-Gakari…being fun??? All it took was something vaguely resembling the title number to a cartoon about giant robots.

KAT-TUN “RUN FOR YOU”

[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bdzm0V8Jnvg”]

Oh, you clever bastards, KAT-TUN. You think I don’t see what you’re up to with this “RUN FOR YOU” shizz, a flurry of Auto-tune and Z-grade Knife synths. You want to fool me into thinking this is your “Going! 2.0,” a similarly minded adventure into stupid electro-pop done so giddily that it just felt right, KAT-TUN pulling deep inside themselves to do the impossible…make a single that didn’t suck. So hey, bleeps and bloops and robo-whirls and low-key singing like all those superior K-Pop boy bands do, that’ll fool ’em! But nope…this is just every KAT-TUN (and, by extension Johnny’s) song of yesteryear turned into European Burger King techno with total computer abuse. Oh, and I see that space-station intermission, all laser-show blasts and wannabe-Timbaland stabs at video game touches. Trying to be cutting edge – problem is, the only thing it adds is time for an extended dance sequence.

Kaela Kimura “Kidoairaku Plus Ai”

WATCH HERE

Wrote about this before, but at least unlike some stabs at past glory (SEE ABOVE), Kaela Kimura at least knows to hold onto the elements that made previous triumphs triumph, so even if things don’t hit as squarely in the chest this time they at least still sound enjoyable. Remains a nice, albeit nowhere near prior, single with a goofy video to boast.

Keisuke Kuwata “Special Medley”

I’ve got nothing about Mr. Kuwata, who has some great material both by himself and with Southern All-Stars, but screw these medleys, which are impossible to write about. HOW DARE YOU NOT BEND TO MY SELF-IMPOSED WRITING DESIRES, MUSIC STATION!

moumoon “Chu Chu”

[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H2JZbyo-z88″]

Though not nearly as strange as the still-baffling “Sunshine Girl,” “Chu Chu” confirms moumoon has a really weird way of delivering vocals. It’s not as immediate as it was on that nearly-zombie summer anthem, but you can hear it here and it isn’t just on during the English bits. She says words like they are lined with barbed wire, moving her lips oh-so-carefully as to not slice them open. Everything just sounds…cautiously delivered, despite the fact she sings about kisses and drums. Still strange.

Yet unlike “Sunshine Girl,” “Chu Chu” grabs attention not for being slightly weird but for being a legitimately catchy pop song. THIS is a song of the summer, not the overheated plasticity of “Sunshine Girl.” It’s bouncy and not all that serious and generally lighthearted, but with all the seasonally appropriate sentiments in tow. In a just world, this slice of balloon-animal fun would give moumoon…who lucked into success with “Sunshine Girl” and really hasn’t had any other big hits…would lock her in as at least a mid-level J-Pop star, someone capable of so-so to pretty good singles. If nothing else, she’s at least erased the general unease caused by “Sunshine Girl.”

Winner Of The Week – Remember the angry diatribe at the top of this entry? Yeah, sort of shortsighted in retrospect as the only things worth getting upset about this week were a medley and KAT-TUN which, well, par for the course. The other three songs sounded surprisingly good, two surprises mixed with a solid outing from Kaela Kimura. The best, though, goes to moumoon, who hit all the right summer-pop buttons.

Controlled Karaoke: Fanta Soft Drink Creates Fake Band Called FANTA And Releases A Single. Stop The World I Want To Get Off

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[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6w0rf10nPm0″]

Because we live in an age where most people celebrate a band getting their music used in a commercial, where becoming the backing sound of a new Toyota signals a huge leap forward for a career (and it does, and that’s good!), because this is Japan where this type of thing seems typical, where Perfume releases singles in support of fruity-tasting alcoholic beverages and Girls’ Generation are the voice of computer processor, because there is just enough irony and Marty Friedman here to get people giggling, because most people would just say “lighten up man!” as if I’m snarling at a starving third-world child and not an ad campaign thought up by one of the most nefarious companies on Earth, because it’s not as bad as the God-awful “Wanna Fanta” spots from a few years back…nobody is going to care about this, a fake band created to advertise Fanta soft drinks featuring actual musicians putting out an honest-to-goodness single. And really, nobody should…it’s not a big deal, yeah? Just marketing.

Still, part of me wants to just flip out over this and everything it stands for. Mostly because it is incredibly fucking stupid, and I shouldn’t even have to yell out rhetoric like “stop sucking the four-flavors-plus-seasonal-special teet” when this is so hateable already. Yet still…nobody blinks at this stuff anymore, even when it isn’t a young aspiring band trying to make it but a bunch of established folks earning another buck and the guitarist from Megadeath getting a chance to mug for the cameras. And honestly that isn’t right, because this blows and should be doused in hate or at least buckets of oh-so-gross grape flavored soda.

Station To Station: Music Station For July 22, 2011 Featuring Kis-My-Ft2, Sakanaction And Kamiji Yusuke

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So I stayed up way past my bedtime on a Sunday night to watch the Women’s World Cup Final and not only was treated to the best game of soccer I’ve ever seen…and that’s not some weird jab at the sport, it genuinely was the most thrilling match I’ve ever seen, albeit that’s a small sample size!…but also a fun musical moment. During the halftime break, they kept showing this commercial for some sort of TV special where AKB48, Perfume, Girl’s Generation and a whole bunch of other J-Pop artists would be performing. The surprising part…they soundtracked said ad with “Can’t Stop” by The Red Hot Chili Peppers. Quirky pairing! Onto the music.

Kis-My-Ft2 “Everybody Go”

WATCH HERE IF YOU DARE

What did you really like as a teenager that you now look back on and go “what the fuck was I thinking?” For me, it goes something like: professional wrestling, Pokemon and creating imaginary sports leagues in my head. Thing is, there really is no reason to look back on these kind of adolescent pursuits and beat your mental-self up over them…the “you” at age 14 was a hell of a lot different than the “you” of today, so is it really shocking that teenage-you watched Smackdown! or almost bought a Creed CD once? I’m not the only one to argue this…I’ve seen people make the inoffensive-to-a-fault recording output of Jimmy Eat World, and despite their best attempts at playing it off as a guilty pleasure, boy bands. Who cares what you liked when you were a moody ball of high-school clay?

I imagine the intended market for Johnny’s Junior outfit Kis-My-Ft2 (seriously) is tweens and teens, and I’d like to think ten years from now the kids making up the front row of the live footage in the link above will flip through the Case Logic of their youth and chuckle at themselves. Mostly because, as a 23-bordering-on-24-year-old dude, I hear absolutely nothing redeeming about this track, so I have to assume I’m just old and cynical and maybe this is just some Japanese kids Backstreet Boys. Except the Backstreet Boys didn’t have cheap-butt techno swells and a military march segment in any of their songs (I think, wasn’t my scene). Instead of spit bile at this grating slab of excrement, I’m going to just retreat and let the kids of today enjoy their pop. And pray ten years from now they laugh it all off as a phase.

Sakanaction ““Bach No Senritsu Wo Yoru Ni Kiita Sei Desu”

[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZbXHt3xPr8″]

Wrote about this one already, so click the blue letters if you want expanded thoughts on it. Just a really good song, and Sakanaction seem poised to have a really big second half of the year.

JUJU “また明日…”

[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_vFCktlPXUs”]

Loogit that, this has already been done on Music Station, meaning I already wrote about this once before. Instead of taking the mandatory 10 seconds to see what I wrote before, I’m just gonna guess I plopped down something about a “plodding, melodramatic ballad” before posting an epic nut-shot video of some sort. Welp, watch the clip above and save yourself a Friday night.

One of my big concerns about writing about J-Pop ballads is that I’m missing out on something big because I can’t understand what they are saying completely. I mean, every one of these songs sounds the same…they must be saying some real life-altering stuff to stand out right? Obviously, a bit gets lost in translation, but I found the English lyrics for this song and…well, not really. This either deals with love coming to an end or someone dieing, or if we want to be a little more generous the transience of all life but Tokyo Story this ain’t, which is a subject worth exploring in song seeing as it is a big part of the human condition and all. Still…this seems pretty sap-tastic and if we aren’t setting the bar stupid low for “J-Pop”…this could be a lot better, no?

TVXQ “Superstar

[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ohH9tAmD6I”]

The recent wave of great K-Pop outfits landing in Japan…Girl’s Generation, KARA, 2NE1…has been so exciting compared to the sometimes lame crop of J-Pop that it is easy to forget how crappy a lot of it sounds too. TVXQ has been kicking around the Japanese charts long before the current wave of girl-centric groups, so “Superstar” isn’t some hot-shit debut but rather just another single from a group accustomed to selling well. And that’s good for them, because this single blows! Robo-voices cover up the lack of soul…or any internal organ for that matter…well the verses fart around like a third-string Pitbull club anthem. Maybe slightly more interesting than your typical Johnny’s release, but about as painful to hear.

Kamiji Yusuke “全部好き”

[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-LVOUfpqCmg”]

Hey, the video for this is kinda cute! Shame the song should be stricken from this Earth!

Winner Of The Week – I’m so glad Sakanaction can get on these shows, they make the whole affair a bit more tolerable.

Squiggling It In: Kyarypamyupamyu “Ponponpon”

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[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pb3IdLdIc6s”]

On the one hand, “Ponponpon” sees producer Yasutaka Nakata return to the sorta pure-pop sound he does exceedingly well with Perfume, and sometimes with Capsule and Meg. Now he’s working the boards for a fashion magazine model turned J-Pop singer, someone called Kyarypamyupamyu. “Ponponpon” sounds like Bugs-Bunnied-up electro-pop, Nakata coming home from the club bender of World Of Fantasy to make something partially inspired by dance music but also unabashedly pop. It’s a little too Perfume-without-Perfume, the post-chorus basically lifted from “Dream Fighter” but with a few knobs turned different ways. Still, Nakata tracks trend to draw from a relatively small pool of ideas, but he usually manages to keep them interesting. “Ponponpon” certainly has pure sugar pumping through its veins, and just hearing something this immediately catchy in the wake of Nakata’s club album sounds nice.

Yet there is something about “Ponponpon” I can’t quite put my finger on that drives me up a wall. Well, ignoring the video, a contender for “worst video of the year” if I’ve ever seen one. Nope, it’s that chorus…stupidly put, it is hella annoying. Maybe if one were to be locked in a small space with only this song’s repeated utterances of “pon pon pon” to keep them company, it would grow into something charming. Time will tell if this turns into pop genius or the new Gummibärs.